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Sexy Matters. Whether You Like It Or Not.
Sexy matters. We hate to think that’s true. We look at the girl strutting down the sidewalk, who’s obviously “trying too hard,” and we silently disapprove. But it’s not because she’s trying too hard....
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Where’s Your God Damn Pineapple?
Hi! This post happens to be lathered with images–suds included–so click “Display Images” or click here to view the post on the blog, heartthrob. There’s always a reason why you shouldn’t....
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Fortunately, My Business Is a Hoe. (Important Updates – Don’t Miss This One)
So–*sips stronger coffee than your grandfather*–The Middle Finger Project has been moving and shakin’ its ass all over the dance floor. If she weren’t my business, I’d think she were a huge hoe....
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Call Your Fucking Tribe. (Quickie Friday Piece of Ass)
For my WRITERS–at heart, by trade, or in their wildest, rowdiest, wettest dreams. Because it’s Friday. And this short video will be the most important thing you do all day. (You can’t fool me – I...
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Resent Your Clients?
Too often you do things you shouldn’t. Because you worry that if you don’t answer that email at 11pm, if you don’t squeeze them in this week, if you don’t work within their budget, if you don’t do...
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Copywriting Workshop – Now Available (Pom Poms Provided)
Pom poms is actually a stupid word and I regret putting that in the title. Then again, I’m unconventional–as Erika described me in this month’s Entrepreneur Magazine (did you see it?)–so, really,...
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Lust, Turkey Gizzards + A Ladylike Toast
I blame my bleak and very unpromising cooking skills on Thanksgiving, you know. You’d think I would have gotten better from helping my mom prepare such a yearly feast for me, her and my dad. (Mashed...
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Storm Down The Door of Life With a Hatchet + Some GUMPTION.
I always wanted to be the woman with the white floppy hat. The one with the easy laugh, where time had not made her older, but all the more delightful. The one who carries a basket of strawberries...
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Marilyn Monroe Wouldn’t Give a Damn.
Remember earlier this year… …when I sauntered over to Ecuador and had a twelve year old pierce my nose, as well as agreed to having a random Ecuadorian man sit on top of me on the beach to doodle all...
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The $2,000 Offer to LEAVE a Company
When I was hired as Director of PR for AWeber, the VP of Operations called me into his office two weeks after I had started, and offered me $2,000 to leave the company. “You’ve been here two weeks...
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Finding Your Inner F-Bomb: What To Do When You’re Having a Hard Time Being You
So last night I did what any young lady would do whose internet has been down since Friday and, as a result, is staying in a randomly-selected hotel to mooch mega-bytes: Wondered what the fine...
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Life Coaching AND Boob Jobs? What To Do When You Can’t Pick.
If you’ve ever seen me after a vodka cranberry or two, you know the one thing I get heated up about the most is BUSINESS. I start saying snippy things like, “What moron wrote that on the sign?” or...
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Take Your Lazy Sentences And Piss Off. Politely.
Lazy sentences BOTHER ME. They bother me because it’s not really the sentence being lazy–it’s the person who wrote it. And if that person happens to be a business owner who’s trying to convince me to...
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I Got You Something! Happy Holidays, Sexpot. (Also: Worms, Vomiting and Fire...
I love Christmas. I’m a sucker for the jingle bells and little white lights, which I shamelessly string EVERYWHERE. What’s that, a bathroom vent? Must! Have! Lights! My mom and I used to make these...
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Always Do. You’ll Be Glad You Did.
If you walked in the door right now, I don’t know if I’d run and hug you hard, or if you’d seem like a stranger now. I’d like to think that I’d hug you. I’d like to think that I’d bury my face into...
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Forget Your Manners.
It’s polite to: …fulfill your obligations. …answer them back right away. …nod in agreement. …go with the flow. …do as you’re asked. …drink because they are. …take their call. …give your undivided...
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Remember. (A Quick Read Worth, Well, Reading.)
Remember: Whatever you want to do in 2013, you can do. Whatever you think is too hard, too complicated, too overwhelming–you can figure out. Whatever things you wish you didn’t have to do anymore–you...
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Creating New Offerings–or Revising Your Old? Grab Wine. Listen Up.
Don’t ever buy wine with me. I’m warning you. I’ll be the jerk all the way over in the corner in Aisle 7 trying to buy the obscure, unpronounceable wine that no one’s ever heard of–partly because it...
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20 Ways to Stand Out From The Crowd (Without Swearing or Having a...
I’m currently consulting with a sport fishing business here in Costa Rica. This is quite amusing, given the fact that I do not like fish, eat fish, or want anything to do with fish–particularly those...
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How to Sell Anything In One Paragraph Or Less
What if I told you I could sell anything in one paragraph or less? (Stop glancing skeptically at the screen. I can see up your nose.) You know what kind of paragraph I’m talking about–the sorely...
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