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If You Need a Client Contract Template, I AM YOUR JESUS. [Omg, I just said “Jesus” in public.]

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Well WHADDYA KNOW. Here's me coming in hot on a Thursday morning, still wearing yesterday's underwear, having all sorts of PTSD from the dinner I made last night. (Let's just say I'd rather put fish sauce on my privates than ever eat it on chicken again.)

But alas! I survived! And now I'm all up in this private (ahem, blog) because, fam, we've got A LOT TO TALK ABOUT. Watch out, I'm probably going to make a numbered list. Can you dig a numbered list? Great. Because have I got a list for you.

 

  1. The first thing I want to say is this: The 👏 Middle 👏 Finger 👏 Projct 👏 book 👏 drops 👏 on 👏 Tuesday 👏 at 👏 all 👏 major 👏 retailers 👏.

    Tuesday! As in, this coming Tuesday! So why don't you [clucks tongue] pop on over here and give ‘er a little pre-order love [wink] for the first or the fifth time so you don't have to remember to buy it AND my publisher can not think me a complete jug of spoiled breast milk? That would be great. Nobody wants to be a jug of spoiled breast milk—and pre-order numbers are important. Like, more important than the real sales. It's a metric that helps me a lot. I'll be sending you more about this tomorrow…and Monday…and TUESDAY! Because #celebration! (You should have saw me holding up the book like baby Simba the other day in a restaurant while everyone cheered and some looked aghast. Best day ever.)

  2. THAT SAID. You know I don't do anything without ALSO making a big ol' splash, soooooooooooooooo…

    I'm pumped to announce that we're also launching a long-awaited e-commerce shop called The Quit Your Job Store as a part of the celebration! I'm dying. I'm dead. It's an online shop containing all sorts of free and paid resources to quit your job and do what you love, instead, but I also keep picturing how funny it would be if I had a pop-up, like, in the mall. Or on the street. THE QUIT YOUR JOB STORE. Couldn't you see this being hysterical? I can. So I had to do it. And while it's still under construction (and will totally be a work-in-progress as we move through the year)…

  3. Our very first product is now for sale!

    I'm calling it: “The Client Contract of Wet Dreams,” (a) Because it's that good and; (b) Because the topic of contracts could use some levity, am I right? Isn't this exciting? SO IF YOU ARE SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T HAVE A CLIENT SERVICES AGREEMENT, and you're just running around freeballing it, or piecemealing something together, or have no idea what an agreement with a client should even say, do not walk. Run. Run with your hands in the air like you just don't care and go get this awesome kit I made for you. It's extremely reasonable and will save you thousands upon thousands of dollars when that one client comes around and is all, “I'm disappointed and I want my money back,” or “I'm not going to use what you created so I'm only paying half,” or “Something's come up and I'm cancelling the project” (when you're two minutes away from starting and you've blocked off time). Also great for battling scope creep, the clients who are always “throwing in” this or that, the ones who go MIA and then resurface weeks later. This is about getting yo' boundaries set and showing up like a professional to any client project—and this kit will help you do that the easy way. Comes with annotated and clean copies of the very contracts I use in my own freelance writing business (and spent $5K to have made), plus a 45-minute class where I walk you through it all and teach you what everything means. The most important part: knowing what you don't know! You've got until Monday to get this kit for just $97—so go, go, go! (If you own my Unf*ckwithable Contracts, you don't need this.)

  4. If you're sitting there going, “Man, I wish I had an e-commerce shop. I wish I had an online business. I wish I knew how to do this the way Ash does,” surprise!

    Today starts what we call B-School season. B-School stands for “business school,” but it should really be called, “OB-School,” because it focuses exclusively on teaching you how to do online business. But then I guess “OB-School” would be very confusing with vaginas. 🤷♀ B-School happens once a year and it's a program put on by my esteemed, ass-kicking colleague, Marie Forleo, who is also an author with Portfolio/Penguin Random House. We've got the same book team! Isn't that cute? So here's how this works:

:: Starting today—TODAY, LOVERS—you can now register here to receive a (((free))) super duper fabulous online training series that will give you a simple 6-step roadmap to launch and grow an online business with class and smarts, like we have. [PATS SELF ON BACK]. If you've been daydreaming about having more freedom, starting your own side hustle, or you've got an online biz but there are—eekkkk!—crickets? Go enter yo' email address now, baby, so you get the trainings sent to you in your inbox next week! By entering your email address now, you'll also be tagged as Team Middle Finger Project, and that means you'll qualify for free things later from me if you decide to move forward and join B-School. We track everyone who signs up through us so I can offer my support as well as what you'll get inside of the standard B-School curriculum. So if you want that, take 1.5 seconds and just go enter your email now. >>>

:: Next week, I'll remind you about the other training videos, and then on February 13th, B-School officially opens for enrollment. Right as my book drops! Isn't this FUN? We're going to have so much fun together this quarter!

:: I partner with B-School every year because everyone asks me how I build the online business that I did—and this is the answer. I don't have a program available like this, and B-School is world-class. While The Quit Your Job Store is going to be amazing, that's focused on bite-sized resources that you can grab in a pinch, whereas B-School is a full-on “do this, not that, in this order” program you can follow. Hope you'll join in all of the festivities!

 

Alright, that's all she wrote for today! I'll talk to you tomorrow when we start the celebration early for Tuesday's book release! Soooo mannyyyyy funnnnn things. I think I may be in nirvana. Is nirvana a real thing? Must I capitalize nirvana? I should probably capitalize nirvana. But you know how we wait and wait and wait to feel like we've finally got everything under control and life is swimming along smoothly and you wouldn't change a damn thing? Yeah, that never happens, except for right now. Right this moment? I feel like I'm right where I need to be—and I'm glad your ass is here with me.

LET'S DO THIS, TEAM.

To Tuesday!!!

XO,

Ash

The post If You Need a Client Contract Template, I AM YOUR JESUS. [Omg, I just said “Jesus” in public.] appeared first on The Middle Finger Project.


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